Mom Talk Tuesdays: Balance & the Working Mother


When my dear friend Maggie from The Polished Closets invited me to be a part of her Mom Talk Tuesday series, I jumped at the chance.  Not only does Maggie serve as a part of my tribe of people, she's also my gut-check for parenting (her son & our girls are only a few months a part), she's always happy to celebrate large & small victories over a glass of wine, plus she has fantastic style.   After you are done over here, I hope you head on over to Maggie's site, as well as Nina's to read their take on balance in motherhood.

I've written on the topic of balance as a working mother before, but this was before we added two more little ones to our family.  Now even more than ever, balance is a sticky wicket.  The more that I attempt to attain it, the less it seems within my grasp.  Between a full-time gig, an active 7-year-old, a set of nearly-two-year-olds, a husband, & a dog - I have a lot of balls in the air.  In fact, how I refer to our lives these days is an exercise in juggling.

And here's a very well kept secret I'm sharing today - I don't excel in juggling whether it be literal or metaphorical.  It's definitely an intentional practice and something that I work tremendously hard to maintain. And what comes with that are some tips & tools that I subscribe to that help that juggling act go a little easier in our day to day.

Flexibility is the key to getting through the day, the week, the year.
I will be the first person to cop to the fact that I am a Type A person.  I thrive in a structured, controlled environment.  There's some theories out there that children do as well.  However, if there is one thing that I know for certain is that children are unpredictable even with out best efforts to make things are consistent for them as possible.  I found that the more that I got set on a certain way of doing things, when things (inevitably) went awry, I got more bent out shape (as do the kids).  There are days that go smoothly & there are days that are, well, complete shit.  Learning to roll with the punches, adjusting, & course correcting as need be & being okay with it are paramount to my success in parenting and managing to juggle both work & life.

Determine what is worth your time, energy, & effort - then farm the rest out.
In this day & age when everything is so carefully & beautifully curated around us, it's easy to fall into the trap that you have to do it all.  I stand by the fact that you don't.  Prioritize what is important to you and find a way to farm out the rest.  For someone who works a traditional 9-5, 5 days a week job, I try to find services that can help out either on week nights and/or over the weekend.  We value time with our family since we don't get a ton during the week.  So services which can give us time back over the weekends are where we look to farm out - Cut out doing laundry by hiring a laundry service ; Hire a housekeeper to come into your home even once a month; Bring in someone to take care of your lawn; Order food on a weeknight from a local restaurant via a food delivery service (we love DoorDash). Basically finding anything that makes your life a little easier and gives you time back in your day.

Find your tribe & keep them close.
I mentioned earlier that Maggie is a part of that tribe.  I cannot tell you how much I rely on these people - they are my sounding-boards, my gut-checks, they laugh with me, cry with me, curse with me.  They've been with me from coffee to cocktails to late night ice cream.  Motherhood is hard, but it's even harder in a silo.  You don't always have to share the exact same parenting mantras, but when you have a group of people who get you & support you, it makes this adventure a lot easier.

Accept you don't have to be all things to all people.
Everyone wants to be able to do it all, but I truly believe that you don't have to do it all in the traditional sense.  Rather, I believe that you should do your own version of doing it all.  And that includes knowing that it's OK to let go of what isn't important to you or a priority. 

It's OK to say No
It's OK to guard your time
It's OK to be all things to your people, but not all people

Carve out time for yourself & guard it well.
Self-care is a big term these days, but what it really comes down to is finding something for yourself whether it be an activity like working out, taking time to take physical care of yourself, or even just finding time to sit quietly without a thousand things pulling at you.  Over the past six months, I've started to carve out time for myself by working out.  We also try very hard to stick to a strict bedtime - having time to decompress at the end of the day even after we tidy up the house, is tremendously important to feeling more balanced for me.

and lastly, always carry snacks.
I have found that very few things can't be fixed or righted with a snack.  (Even if it's for you & not the smaller brethren that you manage). 

Don't forget to head on over to the other hostesses of Mom Talk Tuesdays to read their take on the topic:

Marquis @ Simply Clarke
Aubrey @ The Dandy Liar

You Might Also Like


Thank you so much for reading my blog and leaving me a lovely comment! Your support truly makes my day. Hope you come back soon! xoxo